Reconnecting after the kids are gone

By Diane Dennis

Boom!, Jul 31, 2008, Updated Oct 30, 2009

Diane Dennis is a life transition coach appearing monthly on television’s “AM Northwest.” Contact her at 503-972-3441, Dianeden@centurytel.net or www.coachdianed.com.

When the time comes to send your kids off to college, there is an element of satisfaction knowing you have successfully assisted them on their journey into adulthood. After all, we raise children to become independent, autonomous and resourceful adults, right? Then why the long face?

As we roll through the summer months, many parents will be saying goodbye to their graduating seniors. Crafting a new relationship with college-bound kids is one thing. Getting reacquainted with your partner without the distraction and the emotionally and physically draining schedule of raising kids can be like looking into the eyes of a total stranger.

“After you put your relationship on autopilot all those years you were building careers and raising children, reconnecting can be difficult,” says relationship therapist Catherine Melo, an Imago therapist who knows firsthand how difficult readjusting to life without kids can be. Many of her clients are baffled that when the kids go, empty nest can equal an empty marriage.

Melo explains that the therapeutic process of forging an intimate partnership with a long-term marriage includes helping them reconnect, experience what they once experienced and regain a sense of connection and excitement for one another. And it doesn’t always come easily.

1 | 2 Next Page >>

Facebook	Digg	Del.icio.us
Newsvine	Stumbleupon	Reddit